Give it to a busy person.
I’ve been busy.
My return to active duty via ADOS orders (full-time Reservist, if you will) has been hectic, to say the least. Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed at the beginning of summer, it’s been a slog of a learning curve while wearing no fewer than four hats. I could be pessimistic and say I’ve been overloaded, under-resourced, and overstretched, or I can simply say that there have been some amazing learning opportunities and lots of room for personal growth.
It’s been very humbling to go from operating as a confident free agent/pinch hitter/special teams individual to a put-me-in-for-the-whole-game-coach player. Especially at my current unit. Turns out, trying to predict, prepare for, and implement future concepts, science, technologies, and knowledge is hard; more art than science sometimes. So, hey, maybe that Master of Fine Arts I picked up a few years ago might actually prove useful to the Marine Corps after all. I’m living proof that pilots don’t need to be physics majors. You just need to be teachable.
Although I love so many things about living in England – our neighbors, the schools, National Trust properties, English friends and family, Terry’s Chocolate Oranges – it’s not the same as being home. And I am home: the prodigal daughter has returned to the place of her birth, almost to the mile. To be the subject of my own Hero’s Journey is both strange and delightful. Guess I have enough fodder for a follow-on memoir…
Which brings me to the perks of the last few months: 1) home family, 2) work family, and 3) Marine family.
- Home Family. This is by far the biggest gap in my support network while living overseas that I’ve been able to fill. No ding to my English in-laws, family, and friends, but there’s a primal need fulfilled when you’re able to have your mom visit for weeks at a time and not cost an entire month’s paycheck, complete with international travel regulations, driving on the wrong side of the road, different currency, country-specific cell phone charges, and power adapters needed for every gadget. And the fact that the soon-to-be new mom/my twin sister, who is a delightfully close one hour drive up the road (traffic dependent because, you know, Northern Virginia), is as nearby as she’s ever been is not lost on either of us. It’s not my favorite drive, but it’s easier than a 7-hour plane ride over the Atlantic.
- Work Family. I like writing. I like being the introverted crazy cat lady who rocks wooly socks, adult dungarees, and odiferous (in a good way) coffee. If I could pull in my current military paycheck for writing, I’d choose writing in a heartbeat. Certainly if it came with a log cabin in the mountains and no mandatory annual Physical Fitness Test. But, I don’t and it doesn’t. Instead, I’ve rediscovered my work family. You know, that multicultural mix of humans you might not otherwise befriend on the street but find yourself increasingly invested in as you work through problems, deadlines, and projects over a long week? That family. It takes effort for me to befriend new people, but it’s so much easier when you’re forced to show up to the same workspace and you have so many built-in icebreakers and commonalities. And they’ve done a wonderful job of bringing me back up to speed on the day-on, stay-on Corps.
- Marine Family. As a junior officer, I vowed I would never get to the point where, “It’s not what you know, it’s who you know” applied. I’m at that point. All Marines must be “technically and tactically proficient,” as our Leadership Principles teach us, and although I still believe that’s true for me, I now understand that I’m in a different phase of my career: management. Learning this new skillset – no longer doing the thing, but managing the people who do the thing – has been hard. It’s hard to let go, to trust your colleagues, to let things play out. But you can’t do it all; if you try, you’re just micromanaging. The flipside of entering the senior leader realm is how often I’ve run into Marines I haven’t seen for years, sometimes a decade or more. Examples from just last week: meeting my old Commanding Officer who is now a General Officer after a Reserve PME meeting, realizing my instructor for the day was in my TBS company, meeting a flight school buddy on the escalator into the Pentagon, literally running into my ex in the hallway. It’s a small world and only gets seemingly smaller.
I’m trying to strike the right work-life balance and with the kids and my husband finally with me under one roof, I think I’m getting there. School is going well for them, hubs and I both have stable jobs, and I don’t turn into a pumpkin until next summer. I’m looking forward to being a new aunt, Christmas plans are shaping up nicely, and I have a long list of friends in the area I need to have a coffee with while the kids go nuts. There are many options for us for the future and we’re exploring many of them simultaneously.
In the meantime, I’m trying to relax and adhere to our unofficial motto: Semper Gumby – Always Flexible.
Captain Leatherneck 